I woke up and my heart was pounding. I ran to the door and opened it, hoping to see Katy standing in front of my house. My shoulders slumped when I realized that it was only a dream…but it was so realistic.
I remembered exactly what she looked like. I remembered her eyes. They weren’t happy by any means but they weren’t sad or full of fear. They just looked sort of hollow and lifeless. I will admit…that dream shook me up.
I went back inside and picked up her bear. I didn’t even know what she had called it. I didn’t ask Miss Mabel and for all I knew, she had never named it. For some reason it felt wrong for me to give it a name, other than “Katy’s bear.” I found myself talking to it as if it was a surrogate for her. I looked at it and said “Katy, are you trying to tell me something?”
I decided to tell Miss Mabel about my dream. I went to visit her grave every month and talked to her and told her what I was doing and how my life was going. Even though I didn’t believe in the supernatural in any capacity, I asked Miss Mabel to give me a sign if she could hear me talking to her. I asked her to give me a sign if, God forbid, Katy was with her.
I don’t know if people like me, who ask for answers from a source they don’t believe in, ever get them. I guess I just hoped for something that would make me become a believer.
Just as I expected, the sky didn’t darken. The ground didn’t quake. There was no thunder or lightning. I didn’t see any ghostly apparitions nor I didn’t hear any disembodied voices.
I said goodbye to Miss Mabel and told her that I would see her again soon. I asked for her forgiveness because I had broken the promise I made when I told her I would find Katy.
I felt like that promise had given me a purpose. To say that I had failed miserably would be generous.
I think when you have a purpose, you don’t feel so alone.
To be continued______________