Home » A disease-Giving Husband » Every Woman Needs A MANnequin…Or Two

Every Woman Needs A MANnequin…Or Two

They say that all men want a good-girl wife and a trashy-tramp girlfriend.  I really don’t buy into the reverse of that belief because sadly, I have always been a one-man woman.

But the times they are a-changing.  I had one MANnequin named after the luscious Wentworth Miller.  I now have another, named Michael after the character played by the luscious Wentworth Miller.

They are great!  They are the perfect men!

They will never lie to me, cheat on me, hit me, ignore me or emotionally murder me.  They won’t pick up a disease from some trampy skank.  I won’t have to listen to any of their drunk-ass bullshit rhetoric.  I won’t have to listen to them proclaim to be “God.”

Alas, the one thing they would do (ala Loser) is stand there like a dead tree while somebody in a drunken stupor, tortures me.  Fortunately, I no longer allow anybody to do that.

So…here is “Michael aka Wentworth Miller aka Kaniel Outis in Ogygia.”

Here is my mannequin wearing his clothes and shoes.


I had a time getting his shoes on.  I had to use pliers.  Then I had to put his pants on before I attached his right leg and stuck his left leg into this thing-a-ma-bob that holds him up.  He is HEAVY.

The clothes came complete with “dirt” stains and a small hole in the back of the pants.  They don’t smell like him (dammit.)  The only detectable smell is the mannequin, which has a rather pungent plastic smell and is actually giving me a headache.

I told my “other” high school friend about them and he just hollered.  Then he said “you have way too much time and money on your hands.”

Oh yeah?  Bite me.

I have dress forms all over my house.  I have one in the second bedroom, wearing a dress made out of a newspaper.  Those were all the rage in the 1960’s.  I have one in the third bedroom that wears an 1800’s dress.  It has lace inserts and was completely hand-made.  In my bedroom, I have one who wears a pink lace “teddy” from Paris.  I’ve never been to Paris of course, but Loser has and he brought that back to me.  I have never worn it, nor did I wear the other three he brought me.  I gave those away and kept the pink one (although I don’t know why.)

I can’t rival Qin Shi Huang and his Terracotta Army and holy moly,  I wouldn’t want to.  I have enough mannequins now, I think..but ya never know.

 

23 thoughts on “Every Woman Needs A MANnequin…Or Two

  1. I feel like I’m becoming you 😉. Dating and being in another relationship seems foolish to me. Like I’m ever going to trust anyone again…never. If they’re too nice….liar, if they’re too aloof…what’s the point, and if their normal…suspicious.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Another one of my high school friends (the one who said I had too much time and money on my hands) is supposed to come down and take me to lunch tomorrow for my birthday.
      I’m thinking WHY? I’d have to get dressed, act like it was some if deal and remind him that I am not looking for any kind of relationship. UGH.
      Think I’m going to beg off and watch a Prison Break-a-thon!
      It’s horrible that we feel that way but sometimes…you’ve just been too damaged. 😥

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey, if it gives you pleasure and isn’t doing any harm to others, who should judge? I’m glad you don’t allow others to torture you any longer too. It’s tough to gain self esteem if you’re told repeatedly by those who are SUPPOSED to love you that you aren’t worth anything and certainly not love. Your mother was a freak and I hope she’s roasting somewhere hot (besides your trunk); and your ‘husband’? Should develop gonad cancer of an invasive and painful nature. Inoperable of course. But the best revenge is a life well lived and it seems you’re getting started on that path. Yes, there are good men out there…too bad the ones I’ve ever encountered were either married or gay. Oh well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I actually took him to my bedroom and he stands in the corner. I wondered if I would wake up and scream when I saw him but honestly, I didn’t even notice him.
      I woke up to what I thought was somebody pounding on my front door. Nobody was there of course. He’ll stay there, watching over me…LOLOL
      It wouldn’t bother me if “something” of Losers’ fell off. It’s already diseased, so we can only hope. Hahahahahaha.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Just letting you know that there are guys out there (like me) who don’t drink (never have) or lie or cheat and actually treat women with respect. Having said that I seem to have a knack for finding the wrong women who treat me badly or take advantage of my generous nature. Take care and have a good weekend.

    Liked by 2 people

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