Many of us follow Terry, over at spearfruit and have joined him in his journey with cancer, surgery, estranged family members, the sale of his house and subsequent move to Pensacola, Florida.
He walks us through his treatments, his plans and his future goals. Sometimes, he isn’t feeling well and lets us know with an apologetic demeanor. His battle has oftentimes been an uphill struggle and he writes about it with such grace and dignity.
Behind the scenes, is his partner and husband, Gary. He is always there, supporting Terry, albeit mostly in the background. I try not to forget Gary when I comment on Terrys’ posts.
Terry posts about Gary and sometimes, there are pictures of him. The love they have for each other doesn’t need to be defined by me or anybody else. It is there in writing.
Even when the back window of their truck was “mysteriously” broken, the “culprit” was revealed in a loving, tongue-in-cheek, humorous manner.
I’m not sure many of us think enough about the caregivers, the family members, the spouses and the partners of the people we are sending our wishes and prayers to. But they are there, suffering right along with that person. Often, they are the forgotten ones, being overshadowed by the events that are taking precedence in somebody elses’ life.
They give their time, their support, their love and sometimes, I’d be willing to bet, they cry alone.
Being a caregiver, in whatever capacity, requires a strength that often goes unnoticed. These caregivers can’t fall apart. They have to be strong for their loved one, while at the same time, holding themselves up.
They make unselfish sacrifices every day. It is incredibly difficult to watch another person suffer and when that person “belongs to you” the suffering is immeasurable.
Gary and other people in the same role are “unsung heroes.” That’s a phrase that most of the time represents a person who doesn’t get recognition or notoriety but plays an important, supportive role…”behind the scenes.”
They should be remembered.