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Happy New Year

January 1st, 2016.  It’s a new year.  I imaging there are lots of people who will be nursing hang-overs today and fretting about resolutions that will last for just about as long as it took to make them.
No resolutions for me.  No hang-over for me.
I have been awake all night…not because of partying or enjoying the company of family or friends.  If this is going to be an indication of how my year is going to go…I’m in deep shit.
I was thinking about New Years’ Day in 1975.  I had met Loser just five months before and he and I were out with a few of his friends.
The “right turn on red, if clear” had just been implemented.  D*** B***** was driving and drinking (of course…everybody was except me) and he pulled up to a red light.  He said “can you turn left on right, if clear?”  Everybody started laughing but I didn’t.
I wanted to go home.  All I could smell was beer breath and I was worried about how long it was going to be before we ended up in a ditch.  The radio started blasting the “countdown” and everybody was screaming the numbers down to zero.
Loser tried to kiss me and I recoiled.  He smelled like beer.
He kept a journal back then and the next day at the I*** R***, I saw the journal opened to the last nights’ page.  It said “one uncooperative kiss.  Fuck 1975…at least for the beginning.”
I guess I paid for that…for forty-one years.
I’m off to get my head shrunk.
Happy New Year to all!

6 thoughts on “Happy New Year

  1. Happy 2016! Don’t waste your time bringing up that man. He does not deserve it. You deserve to move on and leave Loser in the past with his crappy ways. He and WTC are their own problem and misery. Don’t give them more power by brining them up. They are toxic.
    You deserve & are worthy of happiness. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Precious Laurel. Stop. No, really, STOP. Stop giving Loser space in your brain, and an option to keep you up all night. That is NOT your 2016. Declare it, say it over and over and over. Every time a thought drifts toward him…recently or 40 years ago…say NO! out loud and FORCE yourself to think of something else. And WTC? She isn’t worth even a glancing moment. She is NOTHING, so relegate her to NOTHING in your life. Gather beauty around you…pictures of your amazing quilts…sunsets and sunrises…whatever things make you see “awe” and put them in your wallet, on your counters, taped to your bathroom mirror. Make yourself look at them when these thoughts start creeping in again and notice the color, the artistry, the workmanship. Please, dear Laurel…there is beauty around you and 2016 is the year to begin to see it again. Don’t let him have any more power or hold on you. Today. Choose to start today. We are all here to encourage you!! HUGE HUGS!

    Liked by 2 people

    • HE wasn’t keeping me up all night. I go through phases where I can’t sleep for months and months. I had been doing pretty well lately but last night was just strange. I’ll post about my latest….escapade (shall we say?)
      Huge hugs back.

      Liked by 1 person

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